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Bed Wetting - How to Deal with it for your Baby, Toddler, or Child

For years, parents thought that bed wetting was simply a bad habit or behavior problem. It was generally assumed that ‘little Timmy’ simply had too much to drink before bed, or was just too lazy to get up. Fortunately, today we know better. Bed wetting is a medical condition called Enuresis (en-yur-ee-sis) that many children suffer from. In fact, it is so common that an average of 5 to 7 million children a year turn to overnight diapers, prescription medications, and other possible solutions. And, generally, it is more common in boys than in girls.

So what causes this condition?

Well, there can be many reasons why your child consistently wets the bed.

- It’s genetic. In many cases, mothers, fathers, and even grandparents can pass this onto their children.

- Sleep disorder. Your child could potentially be suffering from a sleep disorder that makes it difficult for them to respond to their body’s ‘got to go’ signal.

- Poor nervous system development. This means that your child may be physically unable to stop their bladder from emptying at random in the middle of the night.

- They may not be getting enough antidiuretic hormone. This hormone acts as a urine controlling agent and prevents the kidneys from creating more urine than your child’s body can manage. Put simply, without the proper hormone levels, your little may be producing an adult sized portion of urine each night.

- Infection. Not being able to hold urine in the body is often a sign of a more serious urinary tract infection.

- And, in some cases, abnormalities in the urethral valves may be to blame.  (ureter for girls)

When should you be concerned?

Generally, the problem of bed wetting will be outgrown by the time your child reaches the age of 5. Until then, it is not necessary to seek out treatment, medical or otherwise. In fact, putting too much emphasis on solving the problem at this young age might only exacerbate the issue and make things uncomfortable for the child. However, when a child of 5 or older continues to wet the bed without any sign that their situation may be improving, you should consider contacting your family physician. He or she will first examine your child for all possible causes and then discuss your options with you. There are medicines available that can help your child to control their bladder functions. Although, be sure to ask about other, non medicated cures as well. Whenever possible, it is best to avoid over inundating your child with drugs or stimulants. Exploring all of your options will allow you to make the best decision for your child.

And remember to try and be discreet when addressing your child’s bed wetting issue. This sort of thing has the potential to be very embarrassing and, if handled incorrectly, have lasting effects on their emotional development. Never punish your child for having accidents. Instead, be encouraging. If you or your spouse or another family member also had trouble with bed wetting, you should bring this up with your little one. Having someone understand what they are going through will ease them through the situation with little to no scarring.

This blog post was provided by Stephanie Parker - our blog writer extraordinaire!

Eating for Two: How Much is Too Much?

You’ve seen it before. You may have even experienced it yourself. An already pleasantly plump pregnant woman defending her mountainous portions of food with the old ‘eating for two’ adage. But the truth is, while being pregnant can cause a woman to have strange cravings, and even experience random outbursts of ‘snackiness’, a consistently increased appetite is not a general symptom of pregnancy. In reality, the phrase ‘eating for two’ refers to the nutrients that the mother takes in through her daily diet. As the mother, you are choosing what your child processes as nourishment, and, therefore, eating for two people. The important difference to note is that it is not how much you eat, but what you eat that is vital to your child’s health and development.

**this is not to say that a malnourished body cannot harm your child. being underweight is just as dangerous as being overweight. take care to maintain the proper physic for your height, age level, and condition while being monitored by your doctor.**

Read on to find out which foods offer the best nutrients for both you and your unborn child, and which foods you should avoid.

To start, you should be sure that you are eating a balanced diet that represents every part of the food pyramid. This includes fruit, vegetables, fish, meat, eggs, fat and carbohydrates.

If your diet is based on calorie counting, then this is how your basic plan should look:

10% protein – meat, fish, eggs, dairy, beans.

35% fat – butter/margarine, oils, dairy, and nuts.

55% carbohydrates – bread, pasta, rice, corn, potato

Certain vitamins and minerals are particularly beneficial to pregnant women. (i.e. folic acid and b9)

**these two are particularly beneficial when taken prior to the pregnancy in preparation.**

How do they help?

B9 assists in the creation of a healthy nervous system for your baby.

Folic acid helps to prevent neural tube defects (spina bifida), and other complications such as cleft lip or palate.

Fortunately for mother and baby, both folic acid and b9 are easy to incorporate into the average meal.

Folic acid can be found in barley beans, fruit, green vegetables, orange juice, lentils, peas and rice. And b9can be found in your local health food/vitamin store.

Other supplements that could ensure a safe and healthy pregnancy are:

Iron

Zinc/Calcium

What foods/supplements should I avoid?

The biggest thing to avoid is vitamin A. You can do this by not eating foods rich in vitamin A such as liver. Also, unpasteurised cheeses and pâté should be removed from your diet due to the risk of transmission of infectious diseases such as Listeria.

**this is not a fully comprehensive list of harmful foods for pregnant women, so be sure to consult with your doctor when planning your diet**

Other foods/vitamins may not be particularly toxic, but may cause unwanted effects during digestion. Constipation is one of the most common of these effects. However, this too can be easily avoided simply by not eating, or eating less of certain foods/vitamins.

One way, is to take in less iron. Overdoing it with this supplement can not only cause uncomfortable constipation, but may have other more serious consequences.

Be sure to eat many fiber-rich foods such as whole meal bread and cereal, fruit, vegetables, and prunes and their juice.

Also, plenty of water and a light exercise regimen (i.e. brisk walking, light swimming, pregnant yoga or pilates) will help keep your stools soft and your intestines moving.

So how much should you weigh throughout your pregnancy?

Here is a guide chart to help you track how much you should be gaining for every stage of pregnancy you enter.

- 0-12 weeks/2 to 4 lbs

- 12-28 weeks/10 to 14 ounces per week

- 28-40 weeks/2 to 6 lbs per month

Overall, a pregnant woman should gain anywhere from 22 to 26 lbs evenly spread throughout her term.

Whether you think you are eating too much or too little, you should always consult your doctor before making a change in your diet during pregnancy. Remember, eating smart and staying fit should be for health reasons only. Pregnant women should never be concerned with losing or gaining weight for cosmetic reasons. Your health and that of your unborn child should always be top priority.

This blog post was provided by Stephanie Parker - our blog writer extraordinaire!

Having a Planned Cesarean: What You Need to Consider

In recent years, more and more mothers have been choosing to undergo pre-planned cesareans as an alternative to natural labor. The most popular reasons being a labor-free delivery, and the ability to conveniently schedule your child's birth. Another reason some women are opting for the surgical procedure is to avoid stretching of the vaginal wall, which some believe is directly related to urinary incontinence in older women. However, this particular disorder most commonly seen in women is generally thought by physicians to be genetic.

Regardless of your personal reasons, The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists has made sure that the choice between a cesarean section and a vaginal birth is solely up to the mother, provided she is fully aware of all the risks involved.

However, many doctors insist on having another physician provide his/her medical opinion before they will agree to perform the surgery. Here's why:

While avoiding the pain and stress of actual labor, the after effects of a cesarean can be quite nasty. The possibilities of infection, painful scar tissue, blood clots, heart failure, coma, and more are increased exponentially. Also, having a cesarean typically increases your chances for needing a hysterectomy in the foreseeable future.

Besides that, probably the biggest downside to having a cesarean is that once you undergo this procedure, your chances of having a natural childbirth the next time, or ever again for that matter, are lessened.

If you do decide to try for a vaginal birth after having had a cesarean, you run the risk of suffering from a uterine rupture.

What is a uterine rupture?

This is when the scar tissue from your previous surgery opens during labor. This often results in either the death of the child, mother, or both. And, while this could happen at any time during any form of childbirth, it is twice as likely when attempting a vaginal birth after a cesarean.

In some cases, doctors manage to avoid a uterine rupture by abandoning the vaginal birthing method during a failing labor and starting an emergency cesarean. You should note that this too can lead to major complications for both you and the baby.

Children that are born out of an emergency cesarean often have trouble breathing on their own. This is because the fluid in their lungs does not get squeezed out via a trip through the birth canal. In some cases, your child may need to stay in the NICU for the first few weeks of it’s life.

That said, most mothers/babies (average 70%) never suffer from any of these injuries/traumas. The risks are there, and very possible, but the past has shown these to be relatively rare occurrences.

Whatever you decide on, be sure to take into account the opinion of your physician. If one or more doctors advise against your plans, you should seriously consider the alternatives.

This blog post was provided by Stephanie Parker - our blog writer extraordinaire!

Bullies! How to Teach Your Child or Toddler to Deal with a Bully

Philosophies on child rearing have evolved a good deal in recent decades. The general populous no longer believes that children should be seen and not heard. We know now that kids don’t really wet the bed out of laziness or spite. And some of us are even turning our backs on spanking as a form of discipline in both the classroom and the home.

This article addresses yet another age old problem both kids and parents face, but with a newly evolved perspective.

Bullying: How to step in without stepping over the line.

Once considered a mostly harmless and necessary childhood rite of passage, bullying is now seen for what it really is, a serious problem that could cause lasting emotional and psychological damage.

Unfortunately, kids haven’t seen the light. Not only does bullying still occur, but it has become the most common form of establishing dominance among children of all ages. And what’s worse, the advancement of the internet has created cyber-bullying, a new and limitless form of peer to peer torture. This includes, cruel text messaging, public slandering of other students, capturing/distributing pranks and embarrassing moments on video, and more.

So how can we put a stop to it without embarrassing our child further? You can start by understanding what bullying is, and recognizing the signs.

Bullying is and can include the following:

- intimidating or threatening another via phone, email, blogs, direct contact, notes, etc.

- constant phone calls (typically those of a malicious nature)

- rumors

- racial comments (derogatory or otherwise)

- name-calling

- physical hitting or any unwanted touching of any nature

- destruction of property

- sexual advancements that are aggressive or oppressive in any way

- deliberate and constant exclusion from group activities

- sexual comments that mock or torment another for any reason

Your child might be the victim of bullying if he/she matches any of the following on a regular basis:

- Complains of mysterious ailments to get out of school. (i.e. headache, stomach ache, fever, chills, body aches, etc.)

- Have any unexplained bruises, scratches, or marks of any kind.

- Reacts poorly to the idea of inviting friends over, joining in after school activities, or attending school functions.

- Becomes increasingly introverted over time.

- Begin to display self-destructive behavior.

- Express a desire to harm other students, and/or bring weapons to school.

- Struggle with their school work.

- Exhibit signs of depression or general anxiety.

- Have poor or low self-esteem.

One way to help yourself recognize the signs of bullying early on is to recognize that your child may be a natural target for the average school bully.

Is your child clearly disabled in any way?

Does he/she have any habits that other students or adults may find annoying?

Is he/she emotionally at their peers level? (children who are more mature or less mature can be a target because they are different.)

Does your child excel greatly in academics?

Is he/she non-athletic?

Ask yourself these questions and give yourself truly honest answers. Be aware of your child’s gifts, as well as their shortcomings, and you may be able to prevent situations in which your child’s being ‘different’ makes them an outcast.

When bullying does occur.

- Be direct. Let your child know you always want to know what is going on in their lives.

- Don’t overreact. Going with your gut feeling to go out and ‘blast’ the bully may make your child afraid to come to you in the future. Your reaction may embarrass them. Or, they may fear repercussion from the bully for being told on. Instead, take it slow. Ask questions. Sit back. Listen. Talk with them about how they would like to handle it before you threaten to jump in on their behalf.

- Ask them which friends of theirs are nice, and which aren’t. Get a feel for how many shoulders your child has to ‘lean on’. If he/she has other friends they can rely on for support, you may not need to worry about the bully. If not, then further action may need to be taken.

- Don't wait until your child is bullied to talk about it or take action. And don't wait for your child to bring it up — he or she may not. As the parent or responsible adult, you must take the lead in preventing bullying.

- Talk to your child about their self-esteem. You may think it falls on deaf ears, but kids listen to what we say more than they let on.

- Involve your child in other activities in and outside of school that will give them confidence.

- Place them in situations where they are surrounded by others like themselves and/or with the same interests. This will increase their chances for making friends.

- Get a clear understand of the school’s/facility’s policy on bullying. You may have options that will resolve the issue without embarrassing your child.

- Talk to the teacher. He/she should be willing to help keep an eye out for any trouble in the ranks.

- If the bullying becomes sever (i.e. physical attacks, sexual assaults, public humiliation on a mass scale, and/or constant theft or destruction of property) do not be afraid to take action. Sometimes it is better for your child to be a bit embarrassed by you now, than seriously injured or harmed later.

And, most importantly, never tell your child to simply brush off or ignore bullying. There is always a solution to a problem. Encourage them to continue talking with you about it. Listen lovingly, be supportive, and work together towards a solution. Let them know you are aware of how tough something like this can be to handle. Be there for them. And don’t be slow to step in when things get too rough to handle. Know your child’s limits, and you will know when to step in without stepping over the line.

This blog post was provided by Stephanie Parker - our blog writer extraordinaire!

Giving Your Child or Toddler an Allowance - teaching little ones about money

Of all the skills we try to teach our children as they grow, how to manage their money might just be the most useful in this world. These days, nearly every action requires a credit check. Those with good credit are able to buy/build homes, purchase vehicles, take out loans, and more with relative ease. Those with bad scores… cannot. Having a bad score makes you a high risk to banks and businesses alike. And unfortunately for some, it usually takes a healthy amount of hoop jumping, tape cutting, and co-signing to convince them otherwise.

All of this is avoidable, however, by simply managing your money well from the start. This is where parental guidance and life lessons make their big debut. You, mom and dad, are responsible for how your children perceive the almighty dollar. (…or peso, or euro, or whatever your national currency happens to be). Don’t worry. You don’t have to get out the charts and graphs to show your child the importance of smart money management. You could teach him/her that valuable lesson simply by giving them an allowance! So, why not start now?

‘Show them the money’

Ok, so giving your child an allowance isn’t exactly a new concept. For years children have worked to earn small wages here and there from their mothers, fathers, uncles, neighbors, etc. However, it is becoming more and more unheard of in a society that so readily hands children whatever they need, and sometimes just want. By spoiling our kids in this way, we are depriving them of a lesson that could save them from big financial troubles down the road.

After all, would you bother to learn anything about saving, planning, and making wise investments if all of your needs/wants were met by some unseen, endless wallet?

Not likely, unless you just had some peculiar interest in the everyday fiscal matters of other people.

Of course, you shouldn’t deny them everything. It is perfectly healthy to give your child the occasional ‘just because’ gift, or a ‘reward’ for particularly good behavior/special achievements. Although, try to be cautious when using the material reward system. Your ultimate goal should be for your love, praise, and support/acceptance to be the best reward.

How young can I start?

This part doesn’t really require a lot of explanation. Basically, when they are old enough to start consistently ‘wanting’ things (i.e. ice cream, toys, trendy clothing, etc.), they are old enough to start earning a little of their own spending money.

Don’t be afraid to start them off young. In fact, waiting until children are in their ‘tweens’ can sometimes complicate the learning process. Kids at this age are more interested in friends, pop culture, and other outside influences to listen to your financial advice. In short, younger kids just get more out of the experience.

Should they work for it?

There are two types of allowances. The first is the automatic allowance. This is when a child receives a set amount of money at a set rate of time. (i.e. 5$ every 2 weeks) The automatic allowance praises planning, saving, and making wise purchases. The other type of allowance involves the completing of various chores in and around the house in order to earn small amounts of cash as payment, and often teaches appreciation of money before anything else. The latter is the ideal form of allowance for a child that has been, or is in danger of being spoiled. Although, each form has it’s own benefits. It really just depends on your child.

Many psychologists agree that the linking of monetary reward to chores can sometimes have a negative effect on a child’s perception of teamwork and what it means to work together. It is possible that your little one may develop the idea that helping others is about getting something in return. To avoid this, either restrict payment of chores to only a few special tasks, or opt for the auto-allowance instead. Whichever you choose, be sure to show your child that helping others can be it’s own reward. **

Name your price.

Since a primary reason for giving your child an allowance is to teach good saving and spending habits, it would be wise to ration out the funds in moderately small doses. If you give too much, your little one won’t have to save a penny to get everything he/she wants. If you give to little, he/she may become frustrated and give up on the idea of saving altogether. As a general rule, parents should provide about one to two thirds less money than your child is working towards. For example, if they want to buy a 10$ action doll, then their allowance should average about 2.50 to 5$. Of course, the prices of the items they want are usually lower depending on how young they are. As they get bigger, so do their expenses. Allowances should grow with the child, but remain shy of their goals in order to encourage saving and planning.

Set boundaries.

Lastly, you will need to lay down ground rules as to what can be done with their money. They may have earned it themselves, but you are still their adult supervisor. Don’t allow your child to purchase items that you have expressly forbidden, or that you don’t think are age appropriate for them. Be firm in this while their young so that you can prevent spending disobedience when they are older.

This blog post was provided by Stephanie Parker - our blog writer extraordinaire!